Let’s Talk Numbers, Not Shame
More than 57 million people in India struggle with some form of addiction, be it alcohol, tobacco, drugs, or behavioral patterns like gambling, sex, or screen use. But here’s what’s rarely said out loud:
Addiction is often not the problem. It’s a response to the problem. A survival strategy. A crutch to cope with pain, trauma, and disconnection.
And yet, the most common advice people receive is:
“Just stop. Get some willpower. Think of your family.”
As if addiction is a moral failing, not a mental health crisis.
That’s why therapy for addiction isn’t just a trending term. It’s a necessary shift; from blaming people to understanding them.
When we say "addiction," most people picture alcohol or drugs. But addiction wears many faces; alcohol, tobacco, cannabis, opioids, prescription pills, sleeping aids, stimulants, inhalants, even vape pens. These aren’t just substances; they’re often survival tools for people trying to cope with trauma, anxiety, loneliness, or grief.
In India, the numbers are staggering; over 14.6% consume alcohol, 28.6% use tobacco, and millions misuse opioids and prescription meds, often in silence. Substance use doesn’t always look like a crisis; it can hide in middle-class homes, party scenes, corporate jobs, and school classrooms. And it’s rising fast among women, youth, and queer folks; many of whom are never even counted in national surveys.
But the impact of addiction runs deeper than the body. It’s not just about liver damage or lung cancer but it’s about broken families, lost jobs, emotional isolation, and sometimes even suicide. The tragedy? Most people never get help.
Addiction is NOT a Choice. It’s a Coping Mechanism.
Let’s get real.
Nobody chooses to wake up every day craving something that’s wrecking their body, relationships, job, or peace.
People fall into addiction because something in their world hurts too much to feel.
- Maybe it’s a childhood full of neglect.
- Maybe it’s daily stress in a job that strips your soul.
- Maybe it’s unresolved grief, abuse, shame, or loneliness.
And so, they reach for something that promises temporary peace. A drink. A smoke. A fix. A hit of dopamine.
“Ask not why the addiction; but why the pain”
– Gabor Maté
This isn’t just a poetic line; it’s a radical reframe.
Because we’ve spent decades asking the wrong question.
We ask:
- Why can’t they stop?
- Why would someone ruin their life?
- Why are they choosing this?
So the real question is: What is this person trying to escape from?
Behind every bottle, pill, puff, line, or binge… is a nervous system in survival mode. A story of trauma, loss, neglect, disconnection, or shame that never had a safe place to land.
Therapists do not just ask what you’re using.
It asks why you needed to use it in the first place.
That’s where healing begins.
So, what does addiction therapy do?
Therapy doesn’t just treat the habit. It treats the hurt underneath.
You’re not just asked, “How much do you use?”
You’re asked:
- What feels unbearable in silence?
- When did you first learn to disappear from yourself?
- What are you suppressing inside?
Qualified counsellors in India are now trained in trauma-informed and addiction-specific approaches that go beyond talk therapy:
- EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) for past trauma
- Internal Family Systems (IFS) to explore inner conflict
- Somatic therapy to release body-held stress
- Motivational Interviewing, CBT, and DBT to support behavior change
A Hard Truth: Recovery Isn’t Linear
Imagine you’ve spent 10 years numbing pain with alcohol. Therapy helps you quit. Then one stressful week, you drink again.
Not because you’re “weak.” But because your nervous system still remembers the old shortcut to safety.
That’s when therapy matters most. It helps you decode the relapse, not just punish yourself for it.
Let’s dive deeper
Addiction doesn’t always look like rock bottom. It’s not always a drunk on the street or a stoner in a hoodie.
Addiction can look like:
- The startup founder who can’t sleep without weed
- The mother popping anxiety meds to survive parenting
- The college student hooked on porn as a way to escape loneliness
- The high-functioning employee drinking alone every night
If you find yourself using something:
- Regularly
- Secretly
- Compulsively
- Even when it hurts you or others
…it’s time to ask:
What am I soothing that feels too hard to face?
Decoding the structure of addiction therapy sessions
Therapy for addiction doesn’t come with one fixed script. But here’s what it can look like:
- Building safety — before addressing substance use, your therapist will build emotional safety with you. No lectures. No shame.
- Exploring roots — you’ll look at childhood experiences, relationships, triggers, and patterns.
- Creating alternatives — you’ll learn body-based regulation tools, boundaries, and healthier coping.
- Working with trauma — because addiction and trauma are deeply linked.
- Rebuilding relationships — including with your own body, mind, and inner world.
More and more qualified counsellors in India are now blending Western psychology with culturally sensitive care — understanding the unique stigma, family dynamics, and pressure that South Asians carry.
A Queer and Intersectional Lens
Let’s not pretend all addictions are treated equally.
Queer people, for example, often turn to substances to survive homophobia, family rejection, internalized shame, or closeted realities. Yet, they face more barriers when accessing addiction support.
A cis-het therapist might not understand the emotional toll of dating in secret, hiding your gender identity, or feeling unsafe at home.
That’s why queer-affirmative therapy is critical in addiction spaces — to validate the pain that created the addiction in the first place.
Quick Fact Check:
- Only 1 in 10 people in India struggling with addiction receive treatment.
- Women and queer people are even less likely to seek help, due to stigma.
- Over 50% of those who enter therapy relapse at least once — and still heal in the long run.
Therapy Doesn’t “Fix” You. It Helps You Feel Yourself.
Here’s the honest truth: Therapy can’t promise you’ll never drink again. Or that you’ll suddenly love your body or make peace with your past.
But what it can do is this:
- Help you feel safer in your skin
- Teach you how to pause instead of react
- Help you name your needs without guilt
- Show you that you are not ‘your addiction’. You are the one trying to survive.
What If Recovery Isn’t About Getting Back to Normal?
What if recovery is about creating a new normal; one that isn’t shaped by shame, secrecy, or silence?
Counselling invites you into this version of healing; where relapse isn’t failure, pain isn’t shameful, and recovery isn’t a straight line.
To conclude: Addiction isn’t a life sentence. It’s a loud, painful signal that something deeper needs care. Whether you’re battling a substance, a pattern, or the silence around it: healing is possible.